What’s up?

Oh, not much.

But I’ve been having some problems lately, I guess.

I haven’t been able to look in the mirror lately.

I don’t know why…

But I just think it’s probably because she doesn’t look well or something. 

She’s also aging rapidly.

And he has crows feet.
Her eyes now have heavy bags of dark circles and her chin skin is sagging.

And I can’t catch it.

And it’s hard for me to see it happening because I know where it’s going. 

So it’s like watching a train crash in really slow motion.

Which is worse then if the train crash was happening fast because in slow motion you have all the time to see all the pieces of debris flying all over the place.

You can see the initial impact and the effect that had on everything else.

And what broke first.

Who died first.

How did they die…

And who was next and why.

That’s what it’s like watching yourself die…

Like I am.

And so it’s hard to watch.

And I think that’s why I avoid mirrors a lot.

But there’s also a part of me that finally likes who I see when I see a reflection of me.

She looks more at peace.
She looks more like herself…

Someone I know more than anyone else.

And crazy news, but I like being around her.

So I dunno, maybe I avoid mirrors because she’s transforming so fast I don’t recognize myself.

So we have too many varying opinions about her, it’s best not to look at her until we are on the same page about us. 

So anyway, that’s all I got to say for today.